Saturday, May 8, 2010

The Katy Trail: She's flat, but she's abrasive and likes it rough

Thursday August 13, 2009

Sorry about cutting it short last time. We exceeded our 15 minute limit in the smallest town ever, and there were a bunch of little kids in line behind us waiting to dick around on youtube.

Anyway we went to update in a library in Boonville, MO (2nd Boonville on this trip, first was in KY), but they charged $1 to use the internet, which is a fucking scam because I can buy 6 pop tarts for a dollar, so fuck that place.

The Katy trail is really a nice change, no traffic, lots of bikers (grandmas and grandpas), but the packed limestone disables us from building any real speed. The first day we rode 95 miles, and since then we're are finishing up today in another 20 miles are so. We should be in Kansas within the next two days.

We met a fellow from Turkey, Nasem, who goes to school in St. Louis and is biking the Katy Trail and back. We rode with him for the day and conversed about our trip, life, girls, food, animals, the usual. Then at dinner he whips out a camping stove. Now I love to travel light, and I like to live with some pretty low standards, but when someone offers me something, I do not say no. So he offers me some pasta since he has some extra and I take it, it was a fantastic change from the usual bagel+cheddar cheese dinner. Then he offers Dugg and I some red wine, and I take it. I know, all of you reading are gasping at the fact that Cole drank, but it gets better.

Dugg and I decide to peruse town while Nasem set up camp at the trailhead and went to sleep. We end up in a casino getting out ID's scanned by a machine, and then checking out the gambling scene. There was nothing too exciting there, so we went into downtown Boonville. Dugg and I end up finding the only bar open, and it's hopping with crazy midwestern idiots. The bartender was super hot, Tarena, and I she had the best butt of any babe we've seen on the trip thus far. Dugg buys a pitcher and we split it. Then a creeper named Jeff comes up and tells us he's the town "medecine man". I know what he is implying and we brush it off. Jeff then proceeds to pick up our pitcher, takes a sip, then pours us each a glass. Now Jeff was about 5'7, 140lbs, I could snap this guy in a heartbeat, but I told him that was our pitcher, and he started in about how he though it was his "lost" pitcher, but our looks and tone made certain he wouldn't make that mistake again. So we're hanging out at the bar, I'm hitting on Tarena, she tells us she's 34 and has two kids, one 16, one 9, I told her she had to be lying and out of 1500 miles of riding she's the best looking woman I've met. Dugg and I are almost 2 pitchers deep at this point, but I'm not feeling it, I'm just mellowed out, laughing a lot. Then I turn my head real fast, and that's when I felt it. Dugg, that dickhead got me drunk. What an asshole. So it's a little after 11pm, we had a short ride the next day, so we gave ourself this reward, and we thought we'd go out and have fun. We're paying up and about to head out, and Jeff comes back, he tells me that he's trying to see if the guy across the bar is the "for real" and that he wanted me to keep an eye on his girlfriend for him. Then he asks me "What do you like, some cocaine? some pot? some alcohol?" This is when I kindly told him I was NOT interested, I had my share of shitty beer for the night, I was in a happy mood, and that I had to leave. What a sketch ball.

On the way back, Dugg and I laughed so hard about everything, I was feeling great, and I decided to go into the gas station before bed to ask how much the milk was, gotta keep my breakfast options open of course. Dugg snapped some hilarious photos of me falling on the ground trying to set up the tent drunk, and claiming that it was good enough and I was sleeping just like that.

The next day we had a short ride to Sedalia. It was secluded, we barely saw anyone on the trail. When we arrived in town we had some dinner, bought some Bailey's knock off booze, which was delicious, and talked to some store managers about where to camp. Janie and Diane called the police to try and find out if we could camp in the park, but the only park that would allow it was being used by the State Fair that's up this week. So we went to the trailhead where there was a kiosk and a museum, and we decided that would be fine to lay our sleeping bags down and squat for the night. We ate some snacks, got our bags ready for the morning, and went to sleep in the shadow. While I was looking up at the sky, I must have seen 15 shooting stars. A couple walked by, but they didn't seem phased that we were there. I thought by 12am when I woke up to pee, if no one had come yet we were almost scott free. Not really. 4am rolls around and I wake up to a BEAMING flashlight in my face, held by a man in a dark uniform. He asks "hey, what are you guys doing?" lightly. Dugg replies "sleeping" only half awake. I'm not tipsy from the irish cream at this point, and I sit up and tell the police officer we're bikers passing through, and we heard the park was closed for camping. He said he just patrols the area because there has been vandalism, but if we show him our ID's and they cleared, that we could stay until the morning when we get up. I told him we would leave and find some where to stay if he wanted us to, trying to cooperate. While he radioed in our information, he was actually curious about our trip, what we were doing for food, how we were enjoying the hills, about where we went to school. When he read my name, he ended with "White Male", when he read Douglas Kwan he didn't end with "Asian Male" or "Yellow Male" which I found amusing since his name obviously screams ASIAN. Now, this means a lot coming from me, because I don't like authority, especially the police, but this guy was so nice. He was really young too, couldn't have been much older than us, so I was expecting him to pull some rookie crap and arrest us just to be a hot shot. My knife was right there laying next to my sleeping bag too, it was folded up, and it's not big, but it was clearly visible, and it's bright orange. He left and Dugg and I were cracking up. We high fived eachother for the accomplishment, adding another notch to our adventure, and went back to sleep.

We saw Nasem on his way back today, said goodbye and gave him our journal to keep up on. It's nice to know we're getting somewhere. I think about how far we've come, it's been a full month of biking straight. We've got the routine down. Oh and Sonny had gone home from Klondike park, to Sterling, IL and he's taking Iowa then Nebraska, so we're not sure if we're meeting him in Wyoming or in Colorado, but he said to call him in a week and see what's up. Hopefully we'll see him again. I think that's it for right now, I'm sure Dugg is uploading some terribly inappropriate pictures right now which I believe you'll all enjoy.

-Cole Bear out

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